My husband had a very enlightening conversation with my mother-in-law the other day. It seems she was complaining about the fact that I am not very "entertaining" in the evenings when she comes over. My husbands explanation was so clear and concise, I feel I need to share it with you all. Emad told my MIL exactly this..."Stephanie is a foreigner, she does not bother herself with people. She takes care of her responsibilities and that is it. If she wants to sleep, she will sleep, if she wants to eat, she will eat, if she wants to taker her shower she will take her shower. She will not drop what she has to do, just to sit and entertain you, or me, or anyone else for that matter."
I wasn't surprised she had complained. I do go to bed very early as I love to read for about one hour prior to sleeping. I am normally asleep during school nights by 10:00. Most of the time, I fall asleep with the light on and Emad has to come in and shut it off. I was aware my husband knew me quite well, but I thought about what he said. Egyptians by nature, love people. They will make large efforts to entertain their guests in a grand fashion. If you go to their home, they will serve you to their maximum ability. I used to be somehow like this when I lived in South Carolina. I was a Martha Steward wannabe. Since living in Cairo, I have changed this position. I find that I am busy from 6:00 am until 9:00 pm and I am not sure exactly how I spent my time. I don't have the time for the small details and I just focus on what I deem to be most important. My MIL just shrugged her shoulders, and I am sure she cannot recall the conversation. I have tried to be a bit more attentive regarding her visits. I try not to jump up and start putting clothes away, or unloading the dishwasher, etc. I try to remind myself that the most important things in our life are the relationships we have with the people around us. Leaving a load of clothes, or the dishwasher loaded for an extra 30 minutes will not make any difference if the world stopped rotating. The "could have" and "should have " though, is more than I want to consider. I have to remind myself, I am living in a community that is very communal and led by emotional charges and they do take it personally. I need to respect their societal norms on all occasions and not just a few.
A Woman of Egypt

I found a wonderful Chinese proverb that I just love. It goes...."If there is light in the soul, there will be beauty in the person. If there is beauty in the person, there will be harmony in the house. If there is harmony in the house, there will be order in the nation. If there is order in the nation, there will be peace in the world."

A Woman of Egypt

I finally had a chance to read my September 2006 Oprah Magazine I bought at the JFK airport. Very nice magazine and quite inexpensive. I found a wonderful poem inside and I feel the need to share it with someone. It is found on the cover of the September calendar located on the inside of the magazine.

Live Your Best Life

I will not die an unlived life.

I will not live in fear

of falling or catching fire.

I chose to inhabit my days,

to allow my living to open me,

to make me less afraid,

more accessible,

to loosen my heart

until it becomes a wing,

a torch, a promise.

I choose to risk my significance,

to live so that which came to me as seed

goes to the next as blossom,

and that which came to me as blossom,

goes on as fruit.

Dawna Markova

Until next time,

A Woman of Egypt

I heard a very good suggestion on how to end the problems between Palestine and Israel. The United States should buy Palestine. It probably wouldn't take much money to buy the country. America would then fly the American flag alongside the Palestinian flag. We would provide the same services to Palestinians as are provided to Americans. The education system would improve, we could install American teachers. The problems with Israel will stop immediately as their closest ally has just bought the house next door. I am sure they would never argue with us about border problems. This in turn would eliminate Hezbollah's and Hamas influence in Palestine, since their would be no need for them any longer as Palestinians would receive the same services provided to Americans. No need for suicide bombers, as the quality of Palestinian life would improve. No need for Israel to meddle around the borders, as we are his best friend and ally that bought the house next door. No need for Americans to worry, as we can implement freedom and democracy as we deem to be proper and true. No middle man, no UN, no hidden agendas. We just buy the country, and start running it like a business. I say why not? I have to admit when I first heard the idea I thought...You have to be kidding, buy Palestine, that cesspool, that lost place with with its lost people. BUT, then I saw a picture of some campers lined up in rows in New Orleans where people have been living in them for a year now. I thought...really, what is the difference between those poor lost people in New Orleans compared to the ones living in Palestine. The ones in New Orleans are living better with better services and have access to an education and are never far from a free meal. I say why not buy Palestine?? I think it would be a better investment of money than Iraq. That is a no brainer...just look at the benefits if we bought the country. If Hamas or Hezbollah's social services network could reach it's long, loaded tentacles down to New Orleans and provide what it does to the ones living in campers in New Orleans...who do you think all those campers, squatters, and homeless individuals would be crying for??? I don't think they would be crying out for the US government. Would you??

A Woman of Egypt

I noticed that the new fall TV programs are being advertised on television. It seems in a couple of weeks we will have lots of new "reality" TV shows. It seems that we will have a survival show with people divided into ethnic groups, some families will be allowing the world to see their lack of parenting skills, and a nice show called "Bridzillas" has joined our new fall lineup. I can only imagine what this one is about. Sarcasm aside, I am glad that Dubai is airing these programs as it is much better than watching local television stations and 10 year old movies. It also helps me to retain my humor, as in all honesty I see reality on a daily basis here. One of the things that I noticed while in the states was the fact that I felt completely cut of from the rest of the world. It wasn't merely the fact that the news is lacking in some areas, but primarily I feel it is because Americans are so insulated from the rest of the world. I really have no idea how we created this cocoon around ourselves there, but we managed to do so. I wish we could create that atmosphere here, honestly. Most assuredly it has a lot to do with the fact that the US is a huge continent bordered mainly by water. You do not leave one state and enter into another culture or language. Consider that Italy is about the size of North Carolina. To go from North Carolina to South Carolina, is not a big deal. To leave Italy and go to France is a major change. In the states, you are never far from a free meal. There is a church, or a soup kitchen, or mission open to make sure people eat. We even have Meals on Wheels to feed and serve the elderly. In Egypt, you can step outside of your door and find at least 6 people around you that haven't the money to eat. This is my reality TV show and I see it consistently every day. I NEVER throw food away. If I have a spoon of food left, I put it in a styrofoam container and give it to my bowab to give to someone on the street. Egyptians are not known to doggie bag, but I do. I have asked for doggie bags in restaurants, which is HIGHLY unusual here, and as soon as I exit the restaurant I always find someone to give it to and they are eating it before I can go three steps down the street. I think reality TV should come and do "A day on the life of..." here in Egypt. That would be an eye opener. They do not have to search for a contestant. The first person they meet would be a good contender. Alas, I will soon see what the new fall programs have to offer for entertainment. Checking into someone else's reality for an hour will be a nice change.
Until next time,
A Woman of Egypt